I pretty much win at life, and now you can too!

I WON MY FIRST EVER AWARD FOR THIS BLOG!!

Maybe it's not that big of a deal, but I get excited over the small things in life, like mail...and grapes, but that's a whole different blog post; for a different era. My views on grapes are rather controversial.

I received this award from my fantastical friend, GryphonFledgling(click the link, click it!) and it totally made my day. It also gave me an idea, but I'll get to that later.

The rules of the Versatile Blogger award are:

1. Share 7 things about yourself.
2. Pass the award to 15 bloggers recently discovered.
3. Notify the blogger recipients.
4. Link to the blogger who gave the award.

Here's the deal: I will share 7 things about myself (in a different post).  I will be giving an award to 15 bloggers, but when I give awards I like to go all out. Therefore, I'm changing the rules up. I confess, I don't have 15 newly discovered bloggers to pass an award to. So, I'm starting a segment that will be called..."Blogger of the Week!"

My pinkies are fiercely strong. Fear them.

I'm just kidding. I'm probably going to name it, "Bloggers with Strong Pinkie Fingers."



I will be determining who wins. If you do win, you will receive a pretty badge that I will make myself and an interview here at Reclusive Butterfly. I might even throw in some cheese. Just kidding! You have to earn the cheese.  Be warned, when I give interviews, things tend to get a bit odd.

If you have a blog, post a link in the comments or send me an email (reclusivebutterfly@gmail.com). This is the only time I'm allowing shameless self-advertising, so you better capitalize on it before I change my mind.

The rules are simple:

1. You must update your blog. I'm not asking for consistency. That would be hypocritical, but if you haven't updated your blog relatively recently, you probably won't win.
2. Keep it clean. No R-rated blogs, please and thank you.
3. You're allowed one submission every two weeks.

What I'm looking for:

1. I don't care what you write about. Cheese, motorcycles, and horticulture are a few of limitless possibilities.
2. Intelligent writing is required. You're not perfect and I'm certainly not perfect. I don't expect perfection, but if your blog is splattered with chat-speak, I promise you all my cookies that I will lose my mind.
3. Funny helps. Just a note.
4. Boring doesn't help. You want to know what gets old really quickly? Blogs that are about your boring day. I'm as boring as the next person. My days consist of homework with the occasional jog around the kitchen sink. The most interesting part of my days is when I climb into my sink and yell, "CHEESE IS GOOD" in Danish. So, if nothing happens to you that's worth blogging about, I get it. Really. Please just...don't blog about how when you got out of the car, there was gum on the street and how you...looked at it and then...walked away. You will make me sad.
5. Effort!
6. I love pictures.

I will choose someone to win the award every two to three weeks until I've bestowed 15 bloggers with an award. This segment will replace "Fusion Fridays" because--don't tell anyone, but--Fusion Fridays were my way of being...lazy.  Gasp.

Well, it's time for me to climb into the sink and yell, "OST ER GODT."  While I'm doing that, send me a link to your blog.

Relax, screaming isn't going to make the boat sink any slower.

I don't really know what this picture has to do with anything, but it looks cool

Ah, school starts tomorrow. Back to the grind. The overtime. The hours of toil over Boo Radley's  glowing screen. The stress of deadlines I can barely make. Compulsively checking my grades every chance I get. A sudden rise in my blood pressure and the possibility of gray hair. Joy! No, that wasn't sarcasm. I'm excited. Hence, the exclamation point.

I love school. I do. It's amazing. I love it. Have I mentioned that I love it? Sometimes, it just leaves me a tad frazzled. Like now, for example, I should be getting a jumpstart on my school work by doing my reading for my literature course, but I'd rather finish Mockingjay. Of course, with all the work that must be done I find my self walking in circles and checking Facebook every five minutes instead of even reading for pleasure. I can't relax and I can't work. I'm in limbo. Like when a movie isn't in theaters anymore, but it isn't on DVD either. Or like puberty. -shudder-

Because I can't relax myself, I'm going to help you relax.

*cue Hawaiian hula dancing music*

Below are the cures to some of the most common habits induced by stress.

FUZZY SLIPPERS O.O 

PACING

If you find yourself pacing, sit down.

BITING NAILS

Chop off your fingers. Sounds gruesome, I know, but you can always grow new ones.

What?

You can't? Only lizards and robots can do that?

Well...you can always get cyborg fingers. Who doesn't want some of those?

BITING LIP

Tear out your teeth. Avoid solid food after. This will also solve the nail-biting problem.

BANGING HEAD AGAINST WALL

Distance yourself from walls.

NERVOUS EATING

Lock yourself in a closet. I'm not sure how this helps...it just does.

PULLING HAIR OUT

Shave head.

SETTING FIRE TO RANDOM OBJECTS

STOP.

Not all-inclusive, but certainly helpful, if  I do say so myself. Just remember, relax. Hyperventilating won't make the bullet wound hurt any less.

Have any other stress-induced habits you need help with? Tell me and I'll address it in a blog post.